Jan 26, 2009


Yeah, so school started. My classes seem like they will be interesting, but really time consuming. So far, each of my three teaching classes will require a certain amount of out of school job shadowing. About 35 hours per semester, per class. That’s on top of the normal assignments / reading / testing / things that school entails. Whining aside, I’m pretty stoked about the prospect of hands on training. I love variety in my schedule, so these assignments will break up the monotony of the week…along with giving me some much needed people time. One of my biggest beefs of being unemployed is being alone. All. The. Time. Add alone all the time to the fact that I don’t have a TV and you start to get a Boomer that has began talk to herself in 1st person. Boomer doesn’t think that is healthy. Boomer needs more things to do in her day. Dogs don’t understand Boomer…. Dogs think Boomer needs healthier hobbies.

That aside, one more thing has happened to sabotage my great idea to start a blog….and well….all of my extracurricular online activities. My DH (dear husband…or damn husband depending on the mood) and I have been living in our home a little over a year now. This whole time I’ve had access to Wireless Internet. Free. I’ll avoid going into the specifics of how I was getting free internet, but it looks like the neighbors have finally caught on and locked me out of all of their unsecure networks. A fact that is kind of irksome, I mean, Boomer has been accessing free internet from you for a year….Boomer doesn’t understand why illegal internet access is now an issue. Boomer angry.

I’m not really angry at the neighbors; I’m just angry I have to go into a technology focused store and try to talk to a person about getting wireless internet. This chore is not on my top 10 list of things I want to be doing. This is because of a couple of reasons, but the primary ones seem to be that: Every time I have went into the Cingular I feel like I’m fighting with the staff to get the questions that I want answered. All in all I have had very poor customer experience there. It’s not worth the effort to change my cell phone provider since I only go in there about 1 time every 2 years...but all in all it still makes me procrastinate against going in to set up my WiFi. I much rather bitch about it to you and post my blogs using the schools internet during class. Boomer like to bitch, and procrastinate.

Jan 21, 2009

Lets get Smart

Today is the first full day of our new Presidents term. Today is also the first day of classes and 'full time student' status for me. I'm a bit nervous, but really just excited. I love having a purpose. A clearly defined goal that I can work towards. It's a really great feeling.

I couldn't sleep last night so I stayed up most of the night watching Mr & Mrs Obama dancing, and all the commentary. They're such an adorable couple, everything else aside.

Jan 18, 2009

Wiener Roast


Bitter Cold.
That is what it has been in good ole Missouri for the past week or so. I'm sure it's colder elsewhere, but damn. When the temperature drops to this cold, the dogs quit going outside. That doesn't mean that I don't try to get them to go outside, it just means that they quit going to the door willingly. All of them.
Since the cold started, my days have been going something like this:
5:30 am : Brett gets out of bed to go to work. Dachshunds that might have been on Brett's side of bed quickly suction themselves to me for warmth. We shiver till Brett turns back on the heat (we turn it off at night)
8:00 am: I start waking up. The only good thing about being unemployed is that I don't usually need to wake up with an alarm clock. The dachshunds? They'll remain under the covers, thank you very much. They're not coming out for anything.
8:30 am: By this point I have showered and made myself decent for the world. I go back into the bedroom to check on status of dachshunds. They're still under the covers. I call them, and realize that if they had fingers, they would be pointing the middle on at me. Even the puppy. Traitor.
8:45 am: I call them again. Dogs wake up just long enough to wish, yet again, they had a middle finger. They then go back to sleep. Dyllan starts snoring to add insult to injury.
9:00 am: I have now been awake for an hour. I know they have to pee. They insist they don't. In a pure act of desperation I pull the covers off them. I'm met with blinking, disorientated, and angry dachshunds. They are all piled on top of each other in the center of the bed to maintain warmth. They call this strategy.
9:02 am: They see me reach for them and they scatter like bowling pins. They know what comes after 'getting out of bed.' They're having none of it.
9:10 am: I've collected all the dogs long enough to dress them in their fleece Teckelklub sweaters. Now comes the real dilemma:
If I put dogs on the ground they will scatter and hide. They're good at hiding. I have found Zoe in the pantry once or twice. I only have two arms. Two arms will not hold 4 dachshunds. It's a fact of nature. If I take two dogs out and leave two on the bed, unsupervised, the two on the bed will plot when I'm away. Plotting usually entails one of three things. One, peeing when she's not looking. Two, pooping when she's not looking. Three, hiding.
9:13 am: I decide to attempt to herd them all to the door. At the same time.
9:14 am: All dachshunds are out of bed. They stretch, shake, shiver, and bark appropriately. I say 'Lets go potty,' and all hell breaks loose. Dyllan dives under the bed. Zoe and Bitsy make a run for it down the hallway. Neville is not quite quick enough to avoid being scooped up.
9:25 am: After much yelling, asking politely, threatening, and crying I've managed to get Dyllan out from under the bed. All dogs are now out of the bedroom. I close the door to make sure they can't re infiltrate it. Bitsy gives herself away by sneezing in the bathroom. I shoo her out and close the door. 3 dachshunds found, one to go.
9:32 am: Zoe is not in either spare bedroom. I've made a sweep of all her favorite hiding spots. I close the doors to limit her escape route.
9:45 am: I finally notice part of a fluffy tail sticking out from under the pillows on the couch. Zoe has wedged herself under them and is feigning temporary deafness. All of the dogs have sudden bouts of temporary hearing loss. The vet does not know what to make of this.
9:47 am: I have all dachshunds cornered in the entryway, door open, waiting for them to go outside. They're standing there looking at me like I suddenly sprouted another head. They obviously think that I'm not very bright. They're not going outside.
9:52 am: After much threatening (No FOOD...I Mean IT!), all dachshunds have run outside. Onto the door stoop. No further. I tell them to go potty. They stand, glare at me, and shiver. I consider, briefly, giving them away. I notice neighbors that are checking their mail giving me strange looks. 'Good puppys' I say....'Go Potty' I say....*or I'll skin you* I mumble. While smiling.
9:53 am: Shiver, shiver, shiver.
9:55 am: I open the screen door to go out onto the stoop to chase them into the grass. They run around me, back into the house....straight into their bed in front of the space heater. Laughing.
10:00 am: I give them their victory and start on my housework. I then find 2 random pees and 1 poop on my floor. I imagine dogs laughing again, and start to understand why people drink.
Would someone like to tell me why I decided to get dachshunds? Anyone? Why couldn't I have fell in love with Goldens? Silly, not that bright, will do anything for a cookie, Goldens?

Jan 17, 2009

Your wiener pulled that?

So this morning I went to watch my nephew Rufus, the Dachsador, try his hand at Weight Pulling.

When dogs compete in weight pull, they strap them into a harness and the owner then encourages the dogs to pull a cart over the finish line. After each successful pull they add more weight in (I think) 28lb increments. Don't quote me on the amount, I wasn't paying too much attention to the specifics of the rules. I spent the majority of my time watching these amazing dogs pull pull pull for all they were worth. I was impressed.

It was amazing to watch. Honestly it was. There is nothing I love more than seeing a dog have a job, or doing what they were bred to do. Rufus was not bred to pull weights... but he did an amazing job nonetheless. He took second in his weight class which is great for his first time. He'll compete again tomorrow and I'm sure he'll own the pit bull that beat him today. heh. Not that we're competitive or anything.

That aside, one other noteworthy thing happened. There was a Basenji there named....wait for it.....Batman! Perfect name for a dog with those ears, no? Batman weighed in at no more than 25lbs. Batman pulled 515lbs. It was incredible. Go Batman!

Now, after watching this I'm starting to have ideas. Ideas my dogs would love to lynch me for if they could read my mind. How hilarious would it be for my 10 lb dachshund to be strapped in a harness and pulling a red rider wagon full of weights? Maybe we could strap 3 or 4 dachshunds together...and have a dachshund sled team? Oh, the ideas (and humiliation for them) are endless....

Zoe no pull weights. Zoe hate weights.
Zoe hope you choke.

I could only imagine the amount of spite poo I would have to clean up after attempting to strap my hounds to a wagon. It could be worth it. Just for ammunition I could collect in pictures.

Jan 15, 2009

Do you really want to know me?

Well, hello.
I'm Boomer!
Nice to meet you.

I'm new to the world of blogging so I figured you're in need of an introduction of sorts. I'm 23, married, and a full time student for the first time of my life starting this semester. I'm still reeling from that decision. I'm owned by four amazing little monsters that take up the majority of my time. I'm not too sure you really WANT to know them, but I assume I'll have to introduce you at some point. I'll make it simple and start where they started.

Pooor Dyllan
Oh, Dyllan. He's 8 years old and the first love of my life. Anyone that meets Dyllan is amazed by him, because, well....he's the laziest dog on the face of the earth.

Honestly. He's not motivated by anything, he's put out by everything, and his favorite pass time is sleep. Even eating is a chore for this Queen.

That aside, he's the best snuggler on the face of the earth, and my mother-in-laws biggest fan. The one exception to Dyllans indifference seems to be Tina. That has nothing to do with the copious amounts of food she bribes him with....I'm sure.

Her name is Poshy Princess Doughy

But you may call her Zoe. (Or ZoBall if she's not looking). Zoe is the connoisseur of hording things in her crate, thrower of hissy fits, earthdog natural, Russian assassin, and a part time model. She is well aware you would kill for her highlights.
That aside, she's a smart little thing. She's the 'plotter' of my pack, and though I can never quite catch her in the act...I am on to her. Hopefully this spring we'll be starting Agility. That is, if she doesn't kill me in my sleep before then...hmm.

Miss Bitsy Boo
Oh Bitsy. She's 12, but don't let that fool you. This little gal will run circles around you, your dogs, and sometimes your sanity.

She's the happiest (and loudest) dachshund. Honestly she is. Her favorite things are making muffins on her toys, being chased by Zoe and Neville while holding the blue ball, and Ruff Rooing for all its worth.

She's always happy to see you, to live life, and to meet new friends. Brett and I are amazed everyday by this old soul.

And here's the Pup-Pup
Neville. Our newest addition and our first puppy since Dyllan. He gets his dashing name from the Harry Potter series, in case you're interested. When we first adopted him he went a week without a name. I'm glad it didn't scar him too bad.

Neville is a baby, and is still learning about life. He's only 8 months, and I have a feeling he's been framed, unknowingly, by Zoe on more than one occasion. He's a happy, playful boy and has really put some perk in my little herd. He's learning all kinds of bad habits from his elder brother and sisters. It's a riot to watch. Also, his perpetually adorable head-cocking has saved his little life on many occasions.

These little fiends will take up the majority of my blogging dedication. After all, Brett and I aren't that interesting unless we're preventing them from world domination, trying to force them outside in the rain, or cleaning up dog poo at socially inappropriate times. Besides that, I'm sure there will be snippets of school drama, family woes, amazing friends, and married life in general. I'll try to keep it as up to date as possible. (famous last words?)